What's Mine is Yours

I saw a music video to the song "What's Mine is Yours" by Katherine Nelson a few months ago on facebook.  I was recently reminded of the song and how much I liked it (or related to it) when my dear friend, Shanna Mele, sent me Katherine Nelson's CD for Tace's birthday with this song on it.  The lyrics, especially the first verse, really hit home.

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhMfQVBpoSY

What's Mine is Yours
Counting down days since nine months last summer
From the baby quilts to the sunshine light-switch cover
All the plans she made
Wall-papered dreams she made for him someday

The doctor hardly glanced her way and shut off the monitor
As he walked out the door he said "You're young, there'll be others"
No sirens or loud screams
No rushing or comforting
It was just over

On the longest road toward home
She parked in the church lot and cried
And said

What's mine is yours
It's always been
What slips through my hands has your fingerprints on it
I'm letting go
Remembering
Though Heaven's doors feel shut they're wide open
What's mine is yours

Teenage girl clinging to the gates of mercy
Holding the weight of the world and her newborn baby
Trying her best to be brave
Wrapped in hope giving him away to a longing family

When her courage met their eyes she saw
Somehow her baby was born to be in their arms
And cried

What's mine is yours
It's always been
What slips through my hands has your fingerprints on it
I'm letting go
Remembering
Though Heaven's doors feel shut they're wide open
What's mine is yours.

In this life we come and go and say goodbye
But there's more than we can see with our own eyes
And when my faith's a thread-bare blanket and I can't take it anymore
I remember
What's mine is yours

I'm letting go
Remembering
Though Heaven's doors feel shut they're wide open
What's mine is yours


Listening to this song brings back so many memories.  The whole first verse completely describes our situation.  We were so excited for Tace to get here.  We had bought all the baby stuff we would need, his room was decorated, etc.  Then, in a moment, everything changed so completely.  There were no sirens or loud screams......the world kept spinning just as it always had for everyone else.....yet for us, our lives had been forever altered and our hopes and dreams shattered.  Very few people ever got to meet and hold our sweet boy....Brian and I, both our parents, and my brother Trevor who was at the hospital with us (and the doctors and nurses who cared for us). To some his memory may be long since passed......yet for us, we think of him every single day.  I can relate to the phrase "Though Heaven's doors feel shut they're wide open."  There are times when it may feel like Heaven's doors are shut because of this trial we are facing; however, if we stop to count our blessings and recognize all the help and comfort we've received, we will know that Heaven's doors really are wide open.  Heavenly Father has been pouring out His love to us throughout this past year.  We wouldn't have made it this far without Him and the promises and covenants we have made through Him.  As I listen to this song, and think about how we have been watched over, I do need to remember that what's mine is His.....my little Tace was His before he was mine, and He loves him too.....more perfectly and completely than I ever could (which is difficult to comprehend).

So in conclusion, remember that what is ours is also His.....it always has been and ever will be.  And, He will always take care of those things we hold most dear, just as He is taking care of our sweet little Tace.  For now, we will hold Tace in our hearts while Heavenly Father holds him in His arms.

Turning Outward--A Month of Service

A few weeks ago we had a multi-stake conference for all the married student stakes and singles student stakes in the Provo area.  The first speaker at this conference was one of the stake presidents of a married student stake.  I can't remember his name, but I remember the message he shared.

His son, who was in his twenties, passed away around Thanksgiving last year....which means his son passed away within a week or so of when Tace passed away.  He talked about the pain and emptiness he felt and the struggles that he went through as he tried to cope with the loss of his son.  He talked about how all he wanted to do was turn inward....he wanted time to himself to go through the mourning process.  However, as a stake president, he had many responsibilities to attend to.  In the first 2 weeks after his son passed away, there were some major crises with members within his stake that he had to help take care of.  He again talked about how difficult it was to reach out and fulfill those responsibilities when he was barely functioning himself.  But, he realized as he reached outward to help others through their trials, he somehow was making it through his own trial.  He then emphasized that there will be times when we will all want to turn inward....but, it is at these times that we should do all we can to turn outward and help someone else in need.  If we focus on helping and serving others, we will receive the strength we need to get through our own trials.

I really liked this message.  So, we decided to start a new Christmas tradition.  This time of year is a time that would be really easy for Brian and I to turn inward.  Tace's birthday brings back memories and a heartache that can be overwhelming.  But, rather than turning inward and focusing on our loss, we want to turn outward in remembrance of our little Tace.  So, the tradition we are starting is "A Month of Service".  This will start every year on Tace's birthday, November 24th, and end on Christmas Eve, December 24th.  We made a stocking for Tace and each year we want his stocking to be filled with acts of service!   (We're getting started a little late this year.)

We would love to have as many friends and family members participate with us each year as possible.  (What better way is there to bring in the true spirit of Christmas than by serving others as our Savior would?!)  Each year I will use this blog, email, facebook, text, etc, to gather feedback on the acts of service.  These acts of service can be as simple as making a sibling's bed or as large as providing Christmas for a family in need.

For each act of service completed, please send me an email (heather.hales89@gmail.com), a text, a facebook message/post, or a post on this blog letting me know what the act of service was.  I will print them off once a week and fill Tace's stocking with them.  We hope to have a whole stocking full of service to go through on Christmas Day!  Thanks in advance to anyone who participates in this tradition with us.